The Man On The 'Oss

Track of the day I Brake For Monster Booty - John Scofield - Uberjam.

In the centre of Bogsville there's a statue of a man on a horse. It's known locally as "the man on the 'oss" and as it's been there since 1866 there's no one in Bogsville who can remember the Square without it.

In need of human company, I found myself in the very heart of the city and realised that something was different. They'd moved "the man on the 'oss". He was no longer in the middle of the Square, the 'oss had somehow wandered over nearer to the shops.

"How dare they?" I said to myself and hurried into the nearby tourist information centre to complain.
A woman stopped tapping on her keyboard and came to offer me some of her information.
I launched right in.

"When did they move the statue?"
"Which statue do you mean?" she asked.
"The one right outside, the man on the horse,"
"I'm not sure," she said. "If you give me a few moments I'll go and look it up. I think it's been moved about three times but I'm not sure of the exact dates."
"I mean the last time it was moved. I don't want the exact date but it must have been in the last two months."
She shook her head. "Well I've been working here for eleven years and it's always been exactly where it is now. It hasn't moved while I've been here."
"Are you sure?" I said.
"Yes, quite sure. Have you been away a long time?"
"Yes, a very long time," I lied.
She nodded. "I thought so."

I thanked her for her help and wandered out into the Square again. The 'oss glared down at me and snorted.

I'd already thought of another question to ask the lady in the Information Centre.