Guru Tips Nerve Engine

Burnet Droolhover's track of the day - Once - Nerve Engine.

Hot tip specialist and rock guru Burnet Droolhover insisted that I embed a link to NE's myspace page in the logo. Don't just take my word for it - test the link and see if it works. It's only a left click away. You never know, Nerve Engine might have a gig lined up near you. Anyway, according to Burnet it's time someone got them into a pro recording studio and unleashed their raw potential on the music world.

Humans and Chimps share ancestors

I fiddled about with some software and crossed Bush and Blair with a chimpanzee. The difference was marked.

At some stage I decided to try the same experiment with UK deputy prime minister with no special responsibilities, two shags, two jags, why wasn't I retired at 65 and if I get my hands on Milt Bogs I'll punch his bloody lights out, John Prescott.

As you can clearly see from the resulting picture there was no apparent difference, some may think it a slight improvement. At some time or other there was obviously a chimp lover among his ancestors.

Ever wondered?

Have you ever wondered why your local council is not performing as well as you think it should be? It is probably because it's sitting round a table somewhere trying to make sense of the pages of electronic claptrap spewing out of the aforementioned John Prescott's ex department.

The I&DeA Knowledge website sets out to explain to councils how to work more efficiently so cast you eyes over this page and you'll find yourself wondering what language it's written in. I went straight to the bottom of the page to find the comment tab but unfortunately there isn't one. My current favourite link is one to the 48 page PDF document that summarises "the main differences between June 2005 and March 2006 LAA guidance".

A 48 page summary of changes after 9 months! Nothing major then. This riveting read contains purple passages such as

'The guidance highlights that certain national frameworks (such as policing BVPIs, NHS LDP lines and the Performance Assessment Framework) will continue to enable national comparisons and commitment is given to aligning reporting requirements to LAAs to avoid duplication as GOs will support local areas to ensure necessary performance information is shared in a co-ordinated way.'

Luckily there's a handy Glossary section. Committee for Research into Abysmal Performance isn't in there. It should be.