Are You In The A A Sir?

Track of the day - Midnight Special - Little Richard.

The engine didn't start when I turned the ignition key. No throaty roar, just a series of loud ticks. I tried again and this time the engine started so I decided to drive around for a while to recharge the battery.
By the time I'd got to the end of the road where I make a left turn I was aware that the engine was revving more than it usually does but I drove on anyway. It was probably just cold and would settle down after a while. It didn't.
There was a car ahead of me brake lights blinking, sitting well out from the kerb, looking like it was going to turn left - or right. It was hard to tell exactly what the driver was going to do so I braked gently and changed down. Volvo's rev counter needle continued to rise, the engine roared even more wildly and the car continued to accelerate. I braked harder and the noise increased.
The driver of the car in front suddenly woke up and decided to get out of the way. Volvo roared off in hot pursuit. I kept my foot on the brake.
"Throttle body butterfly," I shouted to myself over the deafening roars coming from the engine compartment.
I knew what the problem was, not because I'm a technical wizard, but because it has happened before - twice.
Somehow I got the car back home without hitting or killing anyone and immediately set about stripping and lubricating the throttle body. By the time I'd finished, Mrs B. was parked behind me so I decided to leave the test drive until the next day. Big mistake.

Yesterday I was back in the car, my camera on the passenger seat. Might as well make a day of it I decided.
How wrong I was. I turned the ignition key and again was greeted by ominous clicks. Nothing for it but to recharge the battery.
I pulled the release lever for the bonnet (hood). The lever came up towards me but nothing else happened. I was left sitting there with a flat battery and no means of getting to it in the engine compartment.

I phoned the experts.
"Hello - Volvo here. How can we help you?""
And that is where the help started and finished.
"You'll have to drop the car into us. No, there's no way to get into the engine compartment from the outside. We usually have to break the grill to get in. Are you in the A.A. or the R.A.C?"
I gave up. I'd heard it all before from these Volvo guys.
I phoned the A.A.
Within half an hour there was a guy lying on his back under the front of the car, removing three bolts and lifting the bonnet aka hood. The grill was still intact. The release cable had snapped so he made up and fitted a new one, charged the battery and drove off.
He also gave me the name of a local guy who specialises in Volvo repairs so I won't need to phone the experts again.