Reincarnation Love And Romance

Latest on London Tube Shooting. The police now describe the shooting as "a tragedy which was regretted by the Metropolitan Police". The victim had no connection with the attempted bombing incident.

I once interviewed a guy who resembled an amoeba. He assured me that he would never do anything wrong because he didn't want to be reincarnated as a fly or a worm.

For some reason or other, this failed to impress me especially as he couldn't tell me what I would have to do to make sure I was reincarnated as a seabird.

I didn't actually want to be reincarnated as a gull because I don't like flying but I would like to be reincarnated as a track on a Charlie Parker CD or as a tenor saxophone. The trouble is I don't know what I've got to do to make that happen. If only I'd given the amoeba the job.

Love and Romance

I popped in to the Love & Romance Home Page to see what was on offer. There I discovered a list of Lurv Expressions - "noun with adjective". I went straight to the letter S to see if they had sexy bitch but they didn't have it at all. Disappointed I scrolled down the T offerings and found Towering Pride, Treasured Possessions and Trembling Anxiety, all words that no would be lurver should be without. Under D I discovered Delirious Ecstasies, Despicable Vices and Delectable Speculation. C provided me with Corrupting Tendencies and Caustic Remarks.

Using my all new lurv vocabulary, I have put together a billet doux.

Dearest (supply name to suit)

I still don't know why last night's close encounter with your treasured possessions left my towering pride in a state of trembling anxiety. I am truly sorry if the planned delirious ecstasies were, on this occasion, merely delectable speculation.
Your caustic remarks on the subject of my despicable vices and corrupting tendencies were entirely justified.
See you later.
Lurv Milt

P.S. I'll bring a bottle to replace the one I had surgically removed in Accident and Emergency this morning.

You all need this lurv list.

Just seen a headline - Leaves, Roots and Shoots. Sounds like a cue for something.