Bad Taste

Friday.

Here in Bogsville the Hole in the Ground bar is rapidly becoming the epitome of bad taste. When I trotted along the other night I came face to face with Bogsville's version of the Mini.

Surprise, surprise, the bar was empty. I guess people had seen the monster mini and decided to go to a less crowded bar. I looked round to see if I could spot anyone tall enough to need a chariot of that length but there was no one over gnome height in there. You know what they say about men and their motors - someone in there must have been a right prick.

Could you take your driving test in one of those? I'd like to see it do a three point turn.

From one example of bad taste I turn to another.

This is the lager that is currently laying me low. I can drink it in some bars and remain healthy. It used to be fine in the Hole in the Ground but recently it has begun to taste like rusty barbed wire and to attack my innards. I am a mere shadow of my former self. The adverts used to say something about refreshing the parts that other...... I don't know about refreshing - poisoning would be nearer the mark.

I have come to the conclusion that the bar owner either hasn't done the course on line cleaning or is ignoring the process altogether to avoid wastage. If it goes on much longer I'll be the one who is wasted. Which brings me to bad taste number three.

If the barbed wire brew deteriorates further and becomes razor wire brew so that I am wasted in mid pint - it looks like Merl and Raul will have to cart me home in a wheelbarrow because the Hole in the Ground's local funeral parlor doesn't have 24 hour opening. Hole in the Ground - now there's a name for a funeral parlor!