Michael Jackson Ex-Wife "Dumber-Than-Sewage"

Saturday

Picture from cbsnews.com

DUMBER THAN DIRT DEBBIE IS ONE LOYAL DOORMAT

"Michael Jackson sure knows how to pick a wife. She must be highly fertile, dumber than sewage, and possess the self-esteem of a housefly. If possible, that lady should be certifiably cuckoo."

The headline and opening paragraph of Andrea Peyser's New York Post story about Michael Jackson's ex-wife Deborah Rowe Jackson and her testimony, this week, for the prosecution.

The story went on -

"the obese, foulmouthed brood mare used her moment in the spotlight to make a public ploy to win back Jacko's affections."

I think you got it just about right there Andrea and I just loved "dumber than sewage".

Pope Benedict XVI VW Golf For Sale On eBay

Friday

The current bid (Thursday - with 5 hours to go) is €162.161,11, up just about €100.000 on yesterday's leading bid.

This VW Golf, once owned by Cardinal Ratzinger before his election as the new Pope, is for sale on eBay.

The Cardinalmobile, a 2000cc VW Golf that has the magical Ratzinger name in the log book was put up for auction on eBay last Wednesday by a guy from Sauerland in Germany with a starting price of €9.999,00.

By Thursday evening, the bidding was €45.250,00.

Unlike the usual bidding on eBay, bids for the Golf seemed to be falling. By Saturday the figure was €41.564,00, a drop of around €4.000,00 as eBay removed several joke bids.

No chance - Sunday's bid was up to €62.595,00 - a rise of €21,000,00 and there were still 4 days to go!

The auction is not set to end until May 5. Plenty of time to get your bids in.

Anybody want to buy my wife's Polo? If the bids keep falling, we may be able to do a straight exchange.

Fraud Fears Over UK Postal Votes

Thursday

A shining example to the rest of the World of how not to do it.

Postal voting situation 'serious' BBC.

Mystery of the postal vote forms Express & Star.

Election Fraud Probe Councillor Resigns Tory Whip Scotsman.

Vote-rigging factory

Afro Cuban Jazz Manchester

Omar Puente and friends are appearing at the Mint Lounge Basement Bar 46-50 Oldham Street Manchester on Friday 29th April. Telephone 0161 228 1495

Click here for larger image.

Disappearing Google

Looks to me like anyone coming here will have to come from Yahoo or AltaVista - Google has lost me again.

I'll have to stop republishing the damn pages. Why I waste time with the ads or the search bar beats me.

Exploding Toads

Thursday

Larger version here.

I was horrified to read about Hamburg's Exploding Toads that swell up to three times their normal size for no apparent reason before exploding and sending their entrails a metre or so through the air.

The last time I saw my toads here in Bogsville they were fine. Time for a trip to the pond.

Milt reports no exploding toads in the Bogs' pond but plenty of tadpoles and it's raining.

MSNBC are running a story that claims that one German scientist who is studying the phenomenon has a theory that it's caused by hungry crows pecking out the unfortunate toads'livers.

Vee shall see .....

I've noticed a few Australian visitors to this page recently. I suspect they thought I was suggesting toad control techniques. I am thinking of banning future visits after reading the following toad control advice from David Tollner,

"We hit them with cricket bats and golf clubs and the like back then," Tollner told Australian Broadcasting Corp. radio.

"If people can be encouraged to do it, rather than discouraged, the better our chance will be of stopping the cane toads arriving in Darwin and other parts of the top of Australia," he added.

Wendy's Finger And Mountain Lions In San Jose

Wednesday

Rationale by Nerve Engine is at number 4 in the GarageBand chart. Rationale is today's Track of the Day and tops the reviewers' categories for Best Vocal, Best Drums, Best Guitar, Best Bass and Best Production.

San Jose Ca

Latest Wendy's Finger News

Life in San Jose, California sure ain't dull. First there's the story of Anna Ayala who claimed that she found 1½" of female finger in her bowl of Wendy's chili during a March 22 family visit.

Ayala was subsequently arrested at her Las Vegas home on charges alleging attempted grand larceny of millions of dollars, potential trade, lost by Wendy's since Ayala's claim broke in the news.

Seems that no one working for the Wendy's chain has lost a finger and experts who examined the digit said that it didn't appear to have been boiled up in the chili. Added to that Anna Ayala appears to have instigated about a dozen other compensation claims in the past.

Fact remains that, hoax or not, it was a real finger and must have belonged to someone. You would think that in this hi-tech age of DNA testing ..... Well maybe not.

Brings a whole new slant to Wendy's claim to be "keeping in touch with the community."

Today there's a report in SFGate.com about San Jose police shooting and killing an 80 pound mountain lion trapped up a backyard tree by a woman's two pet dogs. Pet dogs!

Police said they decided to kill the animal because tranquilizer darts would not take immediate affect. I don't know about that - they bring rhinos down with them and they weigh a lot more than 80 pounds. Sure you had a tranquilizer gun with you guys?

Found a really nice story in rahrahfeminista2 - Like a dali painting. Washing machines at work! How many hours a week are these people expected to work or do they get snowed in regularly? Nice bit of Colin Powell name dropping too. The blog's also indirectly how I came across this picture from the Denver Channel. Left click on the picture to get the sequence.

UI design? I'm still no wiser even after visiting uidesigner. blogspot.com

Stormtroopers Spotted

Tuesday

Monaco webcam shows sun and a few photogenic clouds. Bogsville window shows murk and drizzle.

Merl and his young lady flew off to Monte Carlo a few days ago to celebrate her birthday. Romance is not dead in Bogsville - just resting most of the time.

Blair's War On Terrorism

I thought the UK took the threat of terrorism seriously.

Judging from this picture sent to me by Graham Elderson, the Kingdom of Tony Blair has been suckered into signing a deal with the wrong security firm again. Some people never learn.

Back to Bogsville - Volvo is off for its yearly checkup this morning so I guess I'll be wandering the city streets, doing a spot of window shopping. If the shops are still there - they keep shutting them down and opening junk disposal emporia instead. Buy it, take it home, look at it once and chuck it away stuff.

Volvo passed its test. I failed mine miserably.

I limped around for an hour feeling like I'd got a nagging toothache in the small of my back. Jeez I hate pain.

It hurts to sit, it hurts to stand and if I lie down I can't guarantee I'll be able to get up again.

Monaco Webcam."Le port, la Condamine et Monte-Carlo (rafraîchissement toutes les minutes)(La camera est située sur le rocher)". Le rocher? À Bogsville dit-on col ou montagne.

Hunter Loses Leg And Eye

Monday

A glass eye and a wooden leg are some of the unusual items left behind in changing rooms in Carmarthenshire in Wales. You have to question how the owner failed to notice the items were missing!

Other items left behind include false teeth, one gent's shoe and a 12-inch jungle knife.

Mind you if a guy didn't notice he'd left his wooden leg and glass eye behind, he's not likely to miss one shoe or his false teeth.

Seems to me there's an old bogger who's in pretty poor shape using the leisure centres in Camarthenshire. Beats me what he needed the jungle knife for.

Nerve Engine Back At 4

The Leeds band Nerve Engine is back up to number 4 in the GarageBand alt Metal file. Yesterday they were down to number 7. What's going on GarageBand?

Seems like I'm not the only one who thinks they have a future.

GarageBand - Nerve Engine

Sunday

Rationale by Nerve Engine is back at number 4 in the GarageBand chart. The track tops the reviewers' categories for Best Vocal, Best Drums, Best Guitar, Best Bass and Best Production.

The chart appears to be based on reviews by other bands rather than on the number of plays or downloads. As GarageBand send out links to tracks that they want other bands to review it seems to me that they are controlling a group's chart position by sending or not sending links to the track. Strange way of judging a band's popularity or potential but that's the way they do it.

I just checked out the GarageBand site and there hasn't been a review of the track posted since May 1st. Come on GarageBand sort it out will you.

I checked out Penn's comment on yesterday's entry and found the site for his local paper, Express & Star.

Quite right Penn - there's no mention of any Wolverhampton link to recent crack cocaine busts in Aberdeen. I guess that it would be bad publicity for the local area whereas the Aberdeen press would be keen to point out that drug problems there are caused by people who come from over the border in England. Seems that crack cocaine prices in Aberdeen are at least twice as high as elsewhere and that's why the dealers go there. Must be the oil industry money that pushes the prices up.

We were supposed to have a house full of young Boggers this weekend, a gathering of the Clan. It came to nothing - one Bogger got up too late to catch the train and the other got involved in a celebratory lunch with drinks and decided to stay where he was.

Eh bien - c'est la vie.

Back Spasm

The weather was good for a change so out we go to the compost heap. There's gold in them there compost heaps! Trouble is we decided to bag it. Bags get heavy and when you try to move them - wallop! Back spasm!

Not a big one - I've had far worse in the past but the Bogs lower back is now setting rock solid at a ninety degree angle to the perpendicular. Looks like I'm going to be flat on my back and dosed up on pills again.

Wolverhampton Men Arrested In Aberdeen Drugs Operation

Saturday

Police in Grampian Scotland report that their Drug Squad has been involved in an operation against Crack Cocaine dealers from the West Midlands in England.

The Aberdeen Press & Journal reports that "Five people appeared at Aberdeen Sheriff Court yesterday, accused of being concerned in the supply of Class A drugs.
Justin Bennett, 31, Jamie Hill, 28, and Shane Lane, 25, all of Wolverhampton, and Colin Middleton, 30, of 399 Hilton Drive, and Colin McGettigan, 42, of 81 Ash-hill Drive, both Aberdeen, appeared from custody.
The Wolverhampton three were remanded in custody and the Aberdeen men released on bail."

A further two 25 year old men were arrested in Wolverhampton last weekend in connection with the operation that led to the recovery of crack cocaine and heroin with a street value of £70,000.

Grampian TV coverage.

BBC Panorama story Crack dealers targeting towns.

Latest News

Leeds band Nerve Engine climb another 7 places to Number 4 in the GarageBand charts with their track Distance.

I've also discovered hiddenplanetradio a station that claims "to bring you the widest variety of unsigned rock bands and artists ever".

Sounds like good stuff to me but then who am I to judge? It does seem to me that unsigned bands deserve somewhere to showcase their talents to wide audiences. Major record companies have been able to pick and choose and manufacture bands to suit their own purposes and use their vast financial clout to market the product.

Independent web based stations like HiddenPlanet should help bring originality back into the pop music scene and help good unsigned bands get the attention they deserve.

Keep the volume up guys.

Amazing Extender For Chicks With Dicks

Friday

Today we're examining the fascinating world of "Chicks with Dicks".

Amazing revelations from my spam mailbox when emailers Patti Griggs and Claire Patrick both sent me the same mail -

"I have always worried about the size of my penis. When I have sex, even though she says that the sex is good, I know that what she really wants is an extra inch!
3 months ago I found The Extender. I just put it on whilst I'm driving the car and when I'm sleeping. It stays hidden under my clothes and it is really surprisingly comfortable and soft.
I thought that when I took it back off I would shrink back to original size. I was really surprised!"

Now this good ol' boy is all for equality of the sexes but you can take it one step too far.

Patti and Claire should be more worried about being a chick with a dick than about trying to extend it. Same sex marriage may now be acceptable in various parts of the Globe but if wifey needs a partner with a penis, wifey should have married a guy.

As for chicks with dicks driving around in traffic with something mechanical tugging at their nether regions! - I suppose it might eventually solve the problem of which foot to use on the brake pedal.

Patti and Claire - go see a shrink or do something useful and sign up with the MissileDick Chicks and see how it really should be done - Yeehaw!

Elizabeth Fleming and Homer K.Conley write:-

You won't believe what we found, holy !!!!. It's this crazy hookup site. I got laid 6 times this week man, you don't have to use a credit card or anything you won't pay a cent!
There are tons of girls, guys, couples and I'm sure something for you too! Lots of them are just looking for a random hookup, one night stands etc.
So I mean you can either find a one-nighter or someone to fall in love with.

Just what is going on out there?

Must be those Extenders. It sure ain't the Bogsville beer!

Star Wars Marathon Health Warning

Thursday

To mark the release of, Episode III: Return of the Sith, the final installment of the Star Wars series, London's UCI Empire in Leicester Square will host a world exclusive all-day screening on Monday May 16th.

The cinema group will show all six Star Wars films in release order with the grand finale screening of the final installment three days before its 19 May worldwide release.

Starting at 7.00am the event will last about 14 hours with additional breaks for meals. Anyone booking to see the first five films will atomatically get a ticket for the latest one.

The evening's premiere showing of "Revenge of the Sith" attended by George Lucas and the stars of the film will take place across the street at the Odeon Leicester Square.

Booking for the 1,000 tickets starts on Monday 25th April from the box-office and online. Details - www.uci.co.uk

Health Warning

14+ hours is the time it takes to fly from New York to Tokyo, Los Angeles to Sydney or Singapore to London.

I don't want to worry anyone but Deep Vein Thrombosis may be associated with any form of travel where passengers remain sitting for lengthy periods over 5 hours.

So there you go Star Wars fans - make sure you loosen your clothes, take your shoes off, do deep breathing, wave your arms about, drink plenty of water and walk around the cinema bending and straightening your legs every half hour and try to do it without disturbing anyone sitting by you!

Sounds fun. Wonder what the tickets will be fetching on eBay?

Benedict XVI First Mass

Wednesday

Benedict XVI celebrated his first Mass as Pope in the Sistine Chapel this morning. The Mass was televised live by the Vatican Television Center.

There are one or two other pictures here.

Video footage of Pope John Paul II lying in state at the Vatican is available here.

Pope Smoke Vatican

Tuesday

I'm listening to the sounds of the crowd in St Peter's Square in Rome and watching the live pictures from Vatican Television.

The pictures are concentrating on the chimney of the Sistine Chapel. At the moment there is no smoke at all.

I can hear the media helicopters overhead and the clock has just chimed 10.15am Rome time.

Black Smoke 12.00pm. The Cardinals fail to elect a new Pope after the second of today's possible four votes.

BBC News Story

16.20pm Rome time they seem to be paying a lot of attention to the chimney shot. They obviously think the third vote is about to end.

Habemus Papam

A new Pope was elected just before 17.00 pm Rome time.

Crowds in St Peter's Square watch the white smoke on a big screen.

The 78-year-old German bishop, Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, was named as Pope Benedict XVI.

Leeds Rockers Nerve Engine

Monday

Nerve Engine leap another 7 places to Number 4 in the current GarageBand Alternative Metal Chart.

Leeds based Nerve Engine are loud - and the crowd listening to them don't talk much. They are caught up in the pounding drums and bass and screaming guitars.

The singer's voice is an integral part of the aural onslaught thundering from the amps and PA, occasionally emerging to lull the audience into a more tranquil state before dropping back into the driving rhythms that are Nerve Engine's trademark.

Their music is an aggressive, full frontal attack on the audience but the enthusiasm is infectious and once the initial shock is over, you are caught up in the maelstrom and find your head banging around like all the others.

Why have you never heard of them? Because like thousands of live bands, they weren't put together by some agency or A&R department, marketed relentlessly and given pap to perform, they just evolved.

Nerve Engine's web presence is impressive - google Nerve Engine and they are everywhere.

Their latest album, Underneath The Sprawl, suggests there is still more to come from this band.

Some tracks are available on the web but there are no samples from my favourite tracks, Lesson Coming - love the moody, brooding bass and guitars guys, World Waiting - with its bass fills and the chopping title track Underneath The Sprawl.

Listen to Once and Tighten My Grip on their Myspace site.

Wedding Webcam

Sunday

Back in freezing Bogsville after a flying visit to the sunny North. I was less than happy to find temporary road closures blocking my route home. I was within a mile of home when barriers were carried into position on major roads and queues of traffic were diverted every which way. Young guys with mobile telephones and yellow jackets blocking off all access to my area. There was no sign of police and no mention of the disruption in local papers or on the web.

A wedding or a major bank robbery or an obscure religious leader's visit to the town? Who knows.

I have just discovered that I left two pairs of glasses in Boggs Junior's abode, next to the computer. I also left my screwdriver set. The screwdrivers I can do without - but I can't see wohtiut eth assgles...

Wedding Webcam

Here's an interesting webcam link for anyone who enjoys a wedding. If there happens to be a wedding on of course.

You can even send the couple an email. The camera is somewhere in Yorkshire, England - somewhere called Goole. You even have the choice of front or rear view. Pity they don't have sound.

Camera Link.

Does anyone know when the Royal Wedding is? I've found a live webcam link where I can watch everyone turning up to the do. I can see a few people wandering about but it doesn't look very Royal. Mind you the picture frame is impressive.

Windows XP Froze And Stuck

Saturday

Up North again courtesy of Volvo and the offending computer is working, fully reformatted and XP reinstalled, once again locked down tight as a shark's ass - yes that's right - watertight.

That means absolutely nothing on this machine. Within a week it will be locking up and refusing to boot again. Beats me what Bogs junior does to it. He will always deny foolhardy surfing or downloading....

Must be a hardware problem but it seems to be working ok now.

Last time it "froze and then rebooted itself and got stuck". Sorry about all the technical jargon but froze and stuck are very common terms in Windows households.

Just noticed that when we installed about a week ago an error message came up after a reboot but XP appeared to fix itself. Should have wiped the drive and started again right then.

Groundhog Day Volvo Eclipses Canon

Friday

The headlamp adjuster motor was replaced by my friendly Volvo dealership. So was the headlamp unit.

"When we came to replace the motor Sir, we found that the adjuster mechanism in the headlamp unit was broken."

Quelle surprise!

They have yet to replace anything without having to replace something else that costs a fortune. I bought the car because I believed that Volvos were built like tanks and were reliable. So far I've had to have a new throttle body and a new fuel pump. At least the broken, remote headlamp adjuster didn't put me into a life threatening situation, unlike the other two faults.

I really don't want to drive the car any more - I have a strong suspicion that it is trying to kill me. At least the MG that I owned previously just rusted away quietly.

On the other hand it accelerated like smoke.Volvo has a first gear that objects to 7mph and wants to be in third gear at 12mph. Even bicycles with shopping baskets beat me off the lights.

Canon IP5000

Volvo was returned to me at lunchtime so I was able to drive to my local computer store to pick up a new printer. I ordered it on the web and had to print out the order form on my Lexmark.

The guy in the shop couldn't read the form even though I had gone over it in pencil. I pointed out to him that that was why I was getting a new printer. I couldn't read anything I printed either.

This print out an order form really is pretty stupid. If you haven't got a printer or your printer is dead - you are finished.

It's like these on-line help pages that tell you how to get into your computer when it won't boot. You don't need them until the system won't boot and when you need them you can't read them because your computer won't boot.

Never mind - mine's booting fine, the printer is working fine and Volvo's got a new headlamp and adjuster motor. The only remaining problem is poverty. Life could be worse - I could be Michael Jackson. I think he's going to need another face change soon.

XP Fails Up North

Groundhog Day it is. Not only does the Volvo repair cost an arm and a leg, but the news comes in from up North that my XP installation of one week ago is now groveling around moaning about memory dumps and blescreening right left and center.

Like it or not Volvo is going to have to get on the road again piled high with screwdrivers and Stuff.

Looks like another night in a foreign bar. Oh misery :) I told you life could be worse.

Jelly Roll Music In Chicago 1926

Thursday

Climbed into the on-line time machine to catch a 1926 Chicago music gig with Jelly Roll Morton and his Red Hot Peppers. Sidewalk Blues and Steamboat Stomp.

Both these tracks are from www.redhotjazz.com. If you don't have RealPlayer or don't like it or won't use it you really are missing out on some historical offerings on the redhotjazz site.

Link to real.com's free player

Photo from The Louisiana State Museum Jazz Collection

It's a pity their audio links don't work. Redhotjazz's do - you just might have to wait a long time for them.

Chinese Dentists And Swedish Cars

Wednesday

Just in case you missed it elsewhere.Microsoft patches critical flaws

Just back from the dentist's.

She has very strong hands for a small woman! It was almost like being worked on from the inside out.

On the way back I called in at my "friendly" Volvo dealership. The driver side headlight assembly has been making a loud ticking noise and the remote, headlamp adjuster has only been working for the passenger side.

"It's the motor sir. We might get away with just replacing the motor, BUT they are tricky to fit and the connector rod sometimes snaps off. Then you would need a whole headlamp assembly."

I've heard that one before - for sometimes read always. I reckon that if the highly trained mechanics snap it off then it's the garage's responsibility to fix it at their expense not mine.

"Oh and while I'm here can you show me how to turn the headlamps off during daylight running?"
"You can't."
"The handbook says I can."
"The handbook is wrong."

Very cunning these Swedish designed, Japanese constructed, Ford owned, car companies.

We will see what Friday brings. If the worst comes to the worst - Volvo will find themselves blogged. I wrote a piece about two years ago that never made the web - it may be time for resurrection.

Vielen Dank Fuer Ihre Bestellung

Tuesday

Every year I have problems working out what I am supposed to do to make a purchase on the Amazon.de site

I'm ok selecting what I want to buy. The problem comes when I have to fill in the payment and address details.

I'm not suggesting that there is anything wrong with the site itself, it's just that it's all auf Deutsch and I can't remember what the damn words mean.

Today I filled in all the bits and pieces and triumphantly clicked on the button to make the purchase, only to find later that the wrong delivery address had been selected and that the item was winging its way to some poor unsuspecting relative.

Back into Amazon to try to change the delivery address. That proved to be more demanding from a language point of view than making the original purchase.

Credit card info had to be re-entered. At that point I was wondering just how many identical items I was sending around the World. To add to my concern, the automatic notification email failed to appear.

Had I made any purchase at all? Back into Amazon and check the "Wo ist meine Bestellung?" page and make sure the "Persönliche Angaben" are correct.

After struggling round "Hier können Sie Ihre Adressen und 1- Click- Einstellungen verwalten" and other sections for about an hour, an email arrived telling me that my purchase had been made and was being sent to the right address. At least I think that is what it said.

The email ended -

Nochmals vielen Dank fuer Ihre Bestellung!
Amazon.de
and you're done.

I have to admit that I found the final comment just a leedle bit vorrying.

Eating Out In Bogsville

Monday

In the interests of fighting off the ravages of old age, I have not only given up eating but also drinking alcohol.

I now spend most of my time smoking.

Thanks for the spam Tyrone.

hi,
..we email your web site to 2,500,000 opt-in email addresses for free...

Now what on earth would I do with 2,500,000 opt-in email addresses?

Aching Wrists And Big Hooters

Sunday

Felt duty bound to get into the garden again today. Hacked away at jungle for an hour or two and then came inside to recover. At that point I discovered flu like symptoms - burning eyeballs, a dry throat and aching wrists.

Yes I know - sounds like too many porn sites syndrome but I assure you...........

Just dug this snap of Prince Chuck out of the BBC news vaults. It was taken during his last visit to the cream of Bogsville's bars, the Tulip & Tiara.

From the look on his face I guess that he'd just spotted the dame with the unbelievably big hooters.

Of course he might just have been served a pint from the notorious Poison Pull at the gents only end of the bar. Raul and I have suffered from its contents on more than one occasion but we don't get the special glass with the fancy lights on it.

Be Gentle With Me

Saturday

Saturday in Bogsville and it's freezing outside. It's not too warm inside either and I've just remembered that the Lexmark printer is refusing to communicate with XP.

Oh well - it's only money. Perhaps I'll get a Canon - at least I could do some serious damage with it if it refused to print.

I'm feeling thoroughly pissed off today. It must be the funeral and the bloody wedding.

Only the dirtiest bars display signs like this and the barman was honking in the wash basin when I went in the boys' room. Just about sums up how I feel.

Up North Wacking Penguins

Friday

While the rest of the World watched the Pope's funeral I beavered away trying to break another computer.

So far the most northerly Bogs machine continues to operate.

There was a minor glitch yesterday when the new installation of XP refused to boot without the installation disk, but since then all has been fine.

Long may it last. I fear another bug may arrive from somewhere out there in the galaxy to lay it low.

While it was working I discovered this Wackapenguin game.

Mrs B tells me that children all over the place have been playing it for years. Oh well - this child only just discovered it. It kept me happy for half an hour and that's no mean feat.

Milt Up North

Thursday

Here I am up North. It's very cold but the computer is working for a change. Have to admit that the first time we shut it down it came up with an error message about the config.sys file.

The only way we could fix it was through a repair via the installation disk but all seems well now.

It has rebooted half a dozen times now and all the risky software like Messenger has run on it without generating a fault. Fingers crossed all is well now.

Popped in to the local Landlord bar. Drank until fairly late. Shock, horror seemed to be surrounded by a very gay crowd. "Not exactly my cup of tea," as they say, but harmless. The beer was not as good as last time I was here but it was still better than I'm used to in Bogsville. There was a French evening in the bar - mamma's got a squeeze box on her chest etc.

Tomorrow I hope to make the long trek home - depends on the computer entirely. If it continues to work I'll be home. If problems arise I'll have to stay.

Thanks to Merl and Raul for their help - where would I be without them!

Milt Bogs New Dentist

Wednesday

I am now in love with my dentist. She is Chinese and a great improvement on the guy who has looked after my molars for the past twenty years who decided to retire. I am popping over to see again her next Wednesday. Whether she is an expert on molars is immaterial.

I have a problem with my Lexmark Z42 printer. It doesn't like Windows XP.

The Lexmark site claims that the drivers are compatible with XP. I have news for you guys. I just get gobbledygook as if the line feed commands aren't reaching the printer.

Tomorrow I am going North to try to get my son's computer working.

I hope to return the same day but if the box won't work I may have to visit foreign bars. I seem to remember that Northern bars are superior to Bogsville bars.

That wouldn't be difficult.

Body In Apartment Not Found For Six Years

Tuesday

They really care about their neighbours in Walsall UK.

A guy dies on his bed, at home, six years ago and they only find his fully clothed skeleton last June.

The poor guy lived and died in a flat owned by the local Council. They claim to have chased him up for not paying the rent and to have sent someone to change the locks. The workmen obviously took the money and ran. Then the Council boarded up the flats, corpse and all.

The neighbours told anyone who went to the door that he had died or moved away.

Not even his relatives could be bothered to check on him properly.

"After the inquest, Walsall Council's chief executive Annie Shepperd, said the discovery would have been made sooner, if the flats had not been due to be demolished."

Ah that's alright then. It's good to know there's a strong community spirit in UK towns.

BBC story Dead man not found for six years

Fiasco Season Spreads To Bogsville

Monday

My appointment at the local eye hospital glaucoma clinic last February 14 was cancelled and rearranged for today.

I trotted along there and was told by reception that my appointment had been cancelled. No letter to notify me, no phone call - just it's been cancelled.

"No," I said, "that was February 14th. It was rearranged for today."
"Today's appointment as well. We haven't got enough doctors. Some have gone on leave."

I saw red. I refused to leave and kicked up a bit of a fuss.

"This is bloody ridiculous - I do not believe this - You have got to be joking" etc.

They arranged for me to see someone.

"The pressures are normal - keep taking the drops and come back in November." Then the guy asked me if I had had a recent cholesterol test. He had spotted something white in my eye. "It might be a sign of increased cholesterol or it might not. I'll mention it to your GP."

Looks like my intake of alchohol in local bars might have to be reduced or it might not. I've already just about given up eating. Of course it might be my inner halo shining through or it might not.

I just love these medical types.

Another First ScotRail Fiasco

Sunday

Passengers booked on Sunday night's First ScotRail sleeper service from Aberdeen to London Euston found that it had been cancelled.

The explanation was that the engine had broken down.

Passengers were offered travel by local train, stopping at all stations, to Edinburgh and then a bus from Edinburgh to Euston.

Graham Elderson is not impressed. He had to be at work in London at 9.00am.

If this is how Brits organize their public transport system it is not surprising that the rest of the World describe the system as "quaint" ie unacceptable.

First ScotRail didn't deliver tickets, paid for three weeks in advance, and now they haven't even delivered the train.

One couple had booked berths on the Caledondian Sleeper to link up in London with Eurostar's London/Paris service. They were very angry. First ScotRail to Eurostar - sounds like a case of from the "ridiculous to the sublime" and totally unacceptable.

Belgian Police Manual Unfair To Chimps

Sunday

A Belgian police training manual has published photographs of George Bush alongside photographs of a chimpanzee. The manual is to help Ghent police recognise threatening body language in football hooligans.

Tough on the chimpanzees n'est-ce pas?

Goulash And Budvar In Prague

Saturday

Got a text message from Merl who is in Prague for a few days.

It read - "Hmmm goulash in bread and budvar."

Watch out for the guys in the suits Merl especially the ones with the bulges under the armpits.

Poop Scoop

Friday

Police in San Diego are sniffing out a gunman who mugged a bag of poop from a woman walking her dog.

She was out with her dog, Misty, on Monday night when the man in his 20s ran up behind her and grabbed the bag of doggy do.

When he saw what was in it, he threw it away, pointed his gun at the 32-year-old woman and demanded money.

The man then aimed his .22-caliber semiautomatic at the dog and pulled the trigger twice but the gun didn't fire.

The robber ran to a waiting car and fled the scene.

Story from NYdailynews.com